The Waiting Game

I may have mentioned this once or twice, but I hate waiting.  Whether it’s waiting in a long line at the grocery store or waiting for my Amazon order to arrive in the mail, my reaction is the same.  I get impatient, and I’ll admit that it’s sometimes irrationally so.  That said I do my best to keep that reaction in check in public. You’re not going to see me cussing out the cashier or yelling at the clerks in the post office, but even those who don’t know me can probably tell at a glance that I’m not a fan of the waiting game. 

That same impatience extends to my writing. I’m so anxious to finish a novel that I’ve often spent several hours a night working on my latest creation. Once it’s finished, I’m no better. I dive right in to the editing process.  I always tell myself I’m going to give it a few days and take a breather, but I’m usually lying to myself.  This is something that can be both helpful and harmful to my writing. It helps in that it gives me drive and ambition. It hurts when that drive and ambition rushes me and makes the finished product sloppy.   I once had a fellow writer, a rather accomplished one at that, tell me that he really liked my work but he was disappointed with the ending. The way he put it, he could tell I just wanted to get the story over with.

Once again, I find myself playing the waiting game for my writing. This time, I’m waiting for my newly published e-book, Like You Mean It, to be available in e-book stores.  To be fair, it’s only been a week since it was published and accepted for premium catalog placement, and granted the publisher ships weekly to most major e-book retailers. Let’s not forget that if the retailer has a backlog of orders that will cause a delay.  I know all of this, yet I still find myself obsessively checking both my Apple iBooks store and my Nook to see if the book is available. And when I say obsessively, I mean multiple times a day as if it might be there at noon despite not being there at ten.

I like to think I’m not the only one who’s anxious for Like You Mean It to be available at major e-tailers. I imagine that my readers are ready for it to be there too; especially when I told them this would be the month they could have that long awaited book. While I’m sure that’s still the case, the book will still be available this month, I’d much rather that happen sooner than later. For those of you who know me, I’m sure you know the fact that I can’t do anything to speed up the availability offends the control freak in me!

So, like it or not, there’s nothing I can but continue to play the waiting game in the hopes that soon it will come to end. Oh, and I can continue a vigilant review of the bookstores in my e-reading devices. 

Time to Let Go

For the last few months, I’ve been working hard to get my new novel ready for release as an e-book. Okay, it’s not really a new novel.  It’s a novel I’ve shared with the world before. I’d originally pulled it from being a free download on Wattpad because I’d signed a contract to have it published which meant it was no longer mine.

When the publishing contract fell through, I was faced with a choice. I could either try to find a new home for it or make one myself. Being that I’m no stranger to being an independent author, I decided to look into the possibility of releasing it on my own as an e-book.  After doing some research into Smashwords, I was sold. I was going to release this novel on my own. Since I’d offered it free once before, it didn’t seem right to start charging for it so I decided I’d leave it as a free download. This isn’t about making money. It’s about two things really. First, this novel has meant a lot of things to a lot of people, and I want them to have that back. Second, I’d like to build my audience and test the waters of the e-book market.

In the last few months, I’ve read and reread. I’ve edited and edited and edited some more. Some days, I’d think it was great only to find that I used the word was when it should have been what. I told myself that I wasn’t going to let this novel go until it was what I thought was one hundred percent perfect. I was going to keep reading and editing until I wasn’t able to find anything else I could change. Well, you know what I’ve discovered in this process?

I’ve found that I’m never going to be satisfied. Even when all of the mechanics are correct, I’ll still think I should revise a scene or at the very least change a few words. This has opened my eyes to something. If I don’t let go, the readers are never going to have this novel they’ve waited so patiently for. That doesn’t mean I’m throwing in the towel and letting it out riddled with mistakes. That’s not it at all.

I’m here today to say I think it’s ready. After months of work, this novel, whose first draft was written back in 2005, is finally ready to be published. It’s time to let go and hope for the best.

Spinning the Signs

I’m not a superstitious person. I don’t shiver when a black cat crosses my path. I don’t avoid walking under ladders, though I don’t often have occasion to do so. And the fact that one Friday in September falls on the thirteenth doesn’t concern me in the least. That said, I have talked before about signs. No, I’m not talking about street signs. Instead, I’m referring to those external indicators that drive a person’s response to a given situation.

I’ve often looked for signs with regard to my writing. For example, if I get several messages from readers asking me when my next book is coming out, I might take that as a sign that sales are going to be good. Today, I received a sign that I initially thought about making bad but have decided is actually good.

In reading previous posts, I’m sure you’ve noticed that I’m no stranger to participating in writing contests. I can’t remember when or why I started doing this, but I suspect it has to do with wanting to lend some credibility to my resume. Since embarking on the professional writing journey, I’ve entered countless contests. Though I’ve placed in some, I’ve never been the big winner.

Recently, I entered a contest in which my ability to write was judged by the first five hundred words of my young adult novel. Five hundred words is hardly a drop in the bucket which makes me think the judges are trying to determine if the story can hook the readers from the beginning. Today, I learned I was not one of the five authors whose story was chosen to be posted online for fans to vote for the best. This is where the signs come in.

My first reaction to this news was that my failure to advance is a sign that my writing isn’t up to snuff. This is always the first reaction I have when I don’t do well. To get over feeling sorry for myself, I remember the legions of devoted readers I have that have been patiently waiting for the release of my novel, Like You Mean It, which wasn’t the novel I entered in the contest in question. On further reflection, I realized the logic I used to end my pity party was actually a sign in and of itself and that perhaps not advancing in this contest was for the best. In fact, I think it’s a sign that I need to move on from writing contests, at least for the moment, and focus on being a writer.

Some would call this making lemonade when life gives you lemons. It probably is, but I also like to think of it as seeing the signs as they’re meant to be seen. Sure it’s spinning them in the most advantageous light, but what’s wrong with that? If you ask me, it’s better than throwing in the towel.

Encouraging or Discouraging?

Recently, I was contacted by one of my Wattpad readers to ask if she could interview me. The reader liked my work and wanted to use the interview as a means of promoting my work on the site. This isn’t the first time a reader has asked me for an interview, but I’m always flattered and humbled every time it happens, and I always say yes.

During these interviews, I’m often asked the same questions. How long have I been writing? What inspires me to write? Do I ever suffer from writer’s block and what do I do about it? Sometimes, I get asked some interesting questions, which I don’t mind as it makes the interview more fun. Once, I was even asked to play word association, but the words didn’t have anything to do with writing.  At least I don’t think being asked to name the first word I thought of when the reader said the word dinosaur had anything to do with writing!

In my most recent interview, I was asked a new question, one that had to do with writing but one I hadn’t been asked before. The reader asked if I thought any of my novels would ever be published. Given that I self-publish, I took the question to mean did I think a mainstream publisher would ever publish my work. I wrestled with how to answer this question. My first inclination was to say no, I will never be published. I’ve been in this business for eight years and have yet to reach that goal. With each year that passes, it becomes harder to believe in the dream. I hesitated to answer the reader this way because many of my Wattpad readers are also aspiring writers and I’m not interested in being a party to trampling someone else’s dream. In the end, I decided to answer honestly. I said no and I didn’t give it much thought beyond that.

Flash forward two weeks to today where I read an article about twenty-one-year-old author Samantha Shannon. I’d never heard of this woman until I read this article, but she’s being touted as the next J.K. Rowling for her freshman novel The Bone Season. For some reason, this article brought to mind my recent interview in which I said I’d never be published.

Rather than being encouraged by Shannon’s success, I felt the opposite. I suppose that has to do with my age. It’s difficult to be hovering near the edge of forty and have been toiling at this for eight years with minimal success and see an author half my age being given such a prestigious moniker. It calls to mind the big question; am I being passed by publishers because my work isn’t any good? I want to jump on the no bandwagon and ride the coat tails of excuses like it’s a hard business to break into or I have to be somewhat good to have so many readers.

Whatever the reason for my inability to cross over from self-published to mainstream author, one question remains. When I see other authors take the same steps down the road to publishing that I’ve already taken, and they succeed where I’ve thus far failed, am I encouraged or discouraged? Maybe it’s both and the way I feel depends on the day. Maybe it’s neither. Maybe I should be happy for them while staying focused on forging the path to my own success. 

An Interesting Lesson

As a writer, I’m always interested in improving my craft.  I’m one of those writers that will gobble up every book and magazine article aimed at helping me to be a better writer. Thanks to the internet and the subsequent social media explosion, it’s easier than ever for me to find tools designed to make me a better writer.

The best example of this is my Twitter account. There, I subscribe to a number of profiles designed at helping writers not only polish their prose but reach their target audience. Recently, there was a link on my Twitter account posted by one such person I follow. The link had the impressive title of how to avoid getting bad reviews of your novel. The first time I saw this link, I passed on reading the article with my first thought being that writing a good novel is really the only way to avoid a bad review.

When another person I follow posted the same link, I couldn’t resist reading any longer. There had to be something all these people knew that I didn’t. Having once been the victim of a bad review, which was entirely my fault, I wanted to know what else I had to do to avoid a repeat of this disastrous fate.

My expectations were quickly dashed when the article, which was actually a link to an independent author’s blog, was lacking what I’d call helpful advice. In his post, the author recounted his experience with getting a bad review because of his failure to research the profile of the reviewer. It turns out this author sent his book to a reviewer who didn’t care for his genre. The result was that the reviewer didn’t give the book a fair chance before publicly posting the bad review which had the potential of costing the author future readers and sales.  The author of this blog post suggested that every author needed to research reviewers before soliciting reviews of their work.

I hate to say it, but my first thought after reading this blog post was ‘Well, duh!’ If I were attempting to find an agent or publisher for my young adult fiction novel, I would never send queries to people who dealt only with non-fiction. Why then would I send that same novel to a reviewer who only liked Science Fiction and Fantasy or Westerns? I wouldn’t. To me, that’s just basic logic.

It’s unfortunate the author was the victim of a bad review because of his own shortcomings, but I was a little disappointed that the title of his blog post implied it was something it wasn’t. I was expecting to get some tips and tricks on dazzling book reviewers and securing those great reviews. If this author’s blog post is any indication, my first instinct was right on. The only way to get a good review is to write a good novel. Just make sure that novel gets into the hands of the appropriate reviewers. If not, you have no one but yourself to blame.

As to the blog post on avoiding bad reviews, there’s an interesting lesson here. While the author may have been trying to spare colleagues from suffering the experience he did, the title was misleading. It gave the impression it would have all the answers on the subject, which illustrates one very important thing about writing. A good title can make all the difference.

I Beg To Differ

If you’re truly a writer, you write every day. Not because you want to but because you have to.

I didn’t write this quote. I paraphrased it from one I’d seen somewhere else a long time ago. In preparation for this blog, I went searching for it again hoping to use the exact quote and give proper credit to its creator. While I didn’t find what I was looking for, I did find a number of articles devoted to this very topic.

I’ll admit I didn’t read all of the articles. I skimmed over them, but the gist of them was all the same. Writers need to write every day. It polishes their craft and keeps their skills sharp. Those who write every day are not only the masters of their craft but they’re legitimate writers. I’m afraid I’m going to have to respectfully disagree. Not with everything. I don’t dispute that writing every day can sharpen a writer’s abilities. However, I take exception to the fact that it can and must be done every day in order for an individual to be considered a writer.

I’m here to tell you I don’t write every day. Or rather, I don’t make time every day to sit in front of my computer and pound out a few pages. That doesn’t mean I’m not writing. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve started thinking about the direction of my latest novel only to become caught up in writing a scene in my head. This is both a blessing and a curse. While I’m grateful to have an idea as to how I want the story to progress, I’m often the victim of writing prettier prose in my head than what I produce on paper.

To be honest, I don’t have the time or the desire to sit in front of my computer each day. If I did that, it would probably hurt more than help my writing. Many writers, me included, have day jobs; eight hour day jobs filled with stress that require we spend a great deal of time in front of the computer. Many of us have spouses and children that need our attention. After giving to our jobs and our families, the thought of sitting in front of the computer to write the latest chapter sometimes seems overwhelming. When that happens, writing crosses the line from being something we have to do because we’re passionate about it to something we have to do because we’re writers and it’s expected of us. I don’t know about my peers, but when I write because I feel obligated to do so, my work suffers. My scenes are flat, my characters are dull, my dialogue is forced and my work sucks so badly I find myself wondering why I bothered.

I would love to write every day if it was feasible. I can’t think of a writer who wouldn’t take that deal but to say that not writing every day makes me less of a writer is just insulting. I write when I want to, not when I think I should. Besides making me a better writer, it keeps writing from becoming something I dread.

Real writers write every day? I beg to differ!

Another Step Forward

I’ve finally done it.  I’ve taken the next step in releasing my first young adult novel, Like You Mean It. I’ve sent the manuscript to be formatted to appropriate e-book standards. This was a big step for me and it wasn’t because I was putting my work in someone else’s hands. It was something bigger. It was about my desperate need to make sure this work is one-hundred percent polished and ready to publish.

This isn’t my first foray into self-publishing. When I released Letters from Linc back in 2006, e-books were an interesting idea being touted as the wave of the publishing future. Now they’re so prevalent that brick and mortar bookstores are struggling to keep up.

Thanks to e-books, self-publishing a novel is cheaper and easier than ever. Authors don’t have to toil in obscurity trying to find an agent or traditional publisher. Of course, there is a down side. Thanks to e-books, anyone who thinks they can write has the ability to unleash their story on the world. That’s not to say all authors self-publishing e-books aren’t worth reading. Nicky Charles is one of my favorite as is Kyle Adams and both of these authors are self-published. What sets them apart isn’t just good storytelling, it’s their high standards for editing. Their stories aren’t riddled with errors. They don’t lower their standards just because they’re author, editor and publisher. They’ve set a standard I aspire to. Not that I didn’t take my editing seriously before.

When Letters from Linc came out several years ago, I’d read and reread the story. I’d revised and changed and edited. I’d done everything I could to make it free of blemishes so the story stood on its own. At least I thought I had. I was disappointed to get the first printing and find I’d omitted a word in one of the passages. It was a mistake I simply couldn’t afford to fix so I let it go. As it turns out, that wasn’t the only mistake. It was just the only one I saw. Recently, there was a review of this novel posted on Amazon in which the potential reader was so disappointed with my poor editing that she returned the book for a refund. That one stung a lot. I haven’t read the story in years so I don’t know what other mistakes I made, but apparently there are enough that it cost me a sale. 

I have no one to blame for this but myself. I couldn’t afford an editor. I’m not a member of a writer’s group that gets together to critique each other's work. I was afraid to ask a friend or family member to read the work. And when I did my own editing my eyes saw what my mind knew was supposed to be there.

Since then and with my newest novel in particular, I’ve changed my editing technique. I’m determined to give readers the best possible product. I love this novel so much that I don’t want to do anything to detract from its message. I want readers to focus on the story and not the mechanics. I can honestly say I think I’ve done it this time. Of course, I thought I’d done it before and I was wrong. Trust me when I say writers don’t set out to make these mistakes and we’re appalled when they rear their ugly heads.

In a few weeks, my novel will come back formatted and ready for publishing, but you can rest assured I won’t be rushing into anything. I plan to take my time looking over it to make sure nothing was missed. Until then, I’m going to relax and bask in the glow of taking another step forward.